This is a guest post by Mickey Penzer, who is an associate at The Bachrach Group

Dating and hiring have more parallels than you might imagine.  As a professional employment recruiter,  I’m here to tell you that while you think you need the purple unicorn, prince, or princess charming. Mr. or Miss perfect does not exist in real life —and also isn’t necessary for you to be happy with your employee or romantic partner. And, just like searching for a life partner, recruiting is all about finding the one person who is best suited for the position.

I’ve learned over my years in hiring, and now recruiting, that it’s better to find a the right fit for you — the one with the qualifications, demeanor, and experience. It’s about setting your “haves” and your “have-nots” and then riding that wave.

It takes patience, persistence, and self-awareness to come to that realization and then hard work to actually find them and below are some tools to do just that!

Here are just a few of the ways we can get closer to finding that right-fit person:

1. Make sure you’re actually ready.

I see this happen all the time in hiring. The company says they’re ready to fill a position, we find a killer candidate, and then the process stalls. If you’re not ready to take the next step (whether in dating or hiring), just wait. It’s not only a waste of your time and resources, but also of the professionals’ and candidates’ time, too. It is also okay to consult experts or candidates before you are ready, but be honest about where you stand so expectations are managed.

2. Have realistic expectations.

This is where you need to separate what you think you need versus what you really need. It’s the “shiny red ball” syndrome. Whether you’re hiring or dating, keep your expectations in check with reality. Make a list of your “must-haves” and your “nice-to-haves” and make sure to keep the two mentally separate. Also be honest about where you stand in the market compared to your competitors. See #6 below.

3. Be willing to use resources to save you time.

Whether it’s a matchmaker or a recruiter, professional services can save you valuable time (which always translates into money saved). Yet, all too often we opt to do our own legwork to find a date or a candidate. Be willing to use the resources of a professional to save you time. After all, they’re the professional. Of course for recruiting I recommend you consult me and the TBG Real Estate Team, a subdivision of The Bachrach Group.

4. And, if you use a professional, listen to them!

On that note, if you use a professional, be willing and open to their advice. You hired them for a reason; let them do their job! Be open to their suggestions, critiques, and advice.

5. Remember to not be too closed off

When we have preconceived notions that a person isn’t the right fit (whether dating or hiring), it’s easy to write them off and to not take the time to get to know them. When we do this, we miss the opportunity to get to know some really great people. And, in the case of hiring, if we don’t get to know the candidate, we lose the opportunity to place them in a different, more fitting, role.

Refer to #2 and #3,  if they meet your non- negotiables or are sent to you by a trusted person at least have a phone call.

6. Be ready to work on yourself

Another all-important step whether dating or hiring is to do a brand audit. For a company, this means taking a step back to look at the culture, the brand, the benefits, the role. Would you want to work there? In dating, this can mean hitting the gym, getting a haircut, hiring a wardrobe consultant. Just be ready to work on yourself and be open to suggestions.

7. Get out there

Networking is crucial in both your personal and professional life. I’m a big fan of the impacts networking can have—it’s helped me build relationships in all areas of my life. Whether it’s an industry conference like the CRETech New York Venture Conference , the Summit Series, a Bisnow event, YJP, or more personal like Campfire, you’ll find me there making relationships.

What’s that saying … “nothing worth having comes easy”? Finding that good fit whether in life or business) takes time, effort, and patience—but the rewards are so good. What are some of your must-do steps to find the right one?

Need help with your hiring from a professional or want to chat about this article? Email me at